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Just when you feel that you are starting to turn the corner, the twists and turns of this wicked game often come up to kick you in the worst possible areas. Against Grays Athletic on Saturday we got off to our best ever start - a goal from Simon Stewart with just 3 minutes on the clock. This was followed up fifteen minutes later with a well taken goal by Dave Sadler to put us two up.

At the time it was just the cushion I felt we needed, as the loss through injury to Peter Barnsby was a worry, and it wasn't until later that we discovered what an influence he has on our defensive department. We had to shuffle the pack and put Mark Beard to right back, Max Hustwick to centre back and bring Steve McKimm on to cover the midfield.

The change in personnel appeared to affect the positive start and we began to sit deeper and deeper. Lance Key made two great saves which I thought was their chance to get back in the game gone. Mark Jones and Colin Luckett hit great shots at the other end and unfortunately their keeper, in turn, made two great saves or we would have gone three up.

Then disaster - a totally harmless ball into the six yard box wasn't dealt with, followed five minutes later, just on the stroke of half time, with a 'give-away' penalty. We go in at the break two-all. Now there's a game on and we have to pick everyone up and focus on getting a quick goal back.

Second half is only five minutes old and Greg Ball brings a great save from their keeper and Mark Jones does the impossible, with an open goal he hits the post. It was now down to our back four to play tight and keep us in the game and hopefully we could create a few more opportunities and take the points.

As we all saw, who came to the game, our 'back four' let us down. They just couldn't cope with the numerous one on one situations that kept presenting themselves. They scored a third and we never looked like getting back at them.

I've seen an improvement in our commitment and our performances over the last six games and - apart from the Canvey Island game - have always felt in the other five that if we haven't won, we have always been in with a good chance of winning. But still so much room for improvement.

Mark Beard won the Braintree man of the match with 14 votes:

David Bass
Mark Boyce
Steve McKimm
Eddie Saunders
Sean Thurgood

MUNDAY AND K'S PART COMPANY

Stuart Munday, Kingstonian's pre-season signing from Dover Athletic, has left the club by mutual consent.

Commenting on the matter, manager Bill Williams said "Stuart had not been playing well and I had some concerns over his fitness. We had a meeting to discuss my concerns, at which he informed me that due to his work load, he was not able to make the commitment to the Club that I was asking of him."

"This came as a huge disappointment to me, as he played a major part in the future team building plans. But the bottom line at the moment is that we need every player totally committed - so deep down I have to accept and appreciate his honesty."

The Club will retain his registration.

There was an article which was of particular interest to me in the Sunday Express, where Martin O'Neill was saying that there hasn't been a manager born, or will be, that hasn't, or won't, experience the haunting experience of going a long time without winning a match. He was referring to when he first joined Leicester City and didn't get a win in ten outings.

Doubts do cross the manager's mind and of course everyone connected with the club can have their private doubts over the manager's ability. I have always maintained that as football managers we're only a game or two away from disaster anyway.

This particular sequence of results is worrying and where our next goal and next result will come from is not totally clear in my mind at the moment. But what is causing me the greatest concern is why are so many players below par and how both Steve Sedgley and myself can get performance levels up to where they need to be.

Going back to O'Neill's article, he said "I eventually won the respect of everyone, but I thought in those dark early days that the opportunity to do so might disappear. One thing I do know is that despite the natural mistakes made during the course of a game, a completely committed and determined performance from the players will stir the crowd and the desire will flow once again."

This is what we keep preaching to the players, as we certainly have not been getting it week in, week out, over the 90 minutes. We have only been seeing it in small doses. Personally this is the worst start I have ever experienced in thirty years of management and to be frank it's not sitting too well with me.

In the second half against Hitchin Town I saw for the first time this season the type of commitment and spirit that I have been asking of the players. It causes a raising of individual standards, it stirs the blood, and most importantly it creates a higher tempo. That in turn helps move the team forward, create more chances and hopefully score more goals. This same commitment was evident again on Monday night at Purfleet where we gained a one-one draw.

I know that there has been a great deal of emphasis on 'commitment' of late, but until everyone is of the same mind and work rate, believe me, it is impossible to get to the next stage of any team's development.

On Monday evening although I felt we rode our luck for a twenty minute spell in the first half, and can thank Lance Key for a great one on one save to keep us in the game, overall I was pleased with our performance and felt that we deserved to get something out of the game.

We still are lacking in our approach play in the final third and are not looking as though we are going to score too many goals at the moment. But I firmly believe that this is because we still have far too many players who are still short of match practise and who are lacking the sharpness that it brings.

Purfleet are a top three side, unbeaten so far, have played together for five years and are without doubt the best team we have met to date. So taking everything into account, knowing we fielded four nineteen year olds, knowing six players were only into their second outing of the season, knowing that we are still a long way from being right, I have to say that there is definitely an improvement over the last week, but still a very, very long way to go.